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10.
Annual breast exam conducted at Hooters.
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9.
Directions to your doctor's office include "take
a right when you enter the trailer park".
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8.
Tongue depressors taste faintly like Fudgesicles.
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7.
Only proctologist in the plan is Gus from Roto-Rooter.
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6.
Only item listed under Preventive Care coverage
is "an apple a day."
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5.
Your primary care physician is wearing the pants
you gave to Goodwill last month.
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4.
"Patient responsible for 200% of out of network
chargers" is not a typo.
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3.
The only expense covered 100% is embalming.
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2.
With your last HMO, your Prozac didn't come
in different colors with little "m's" on them.
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AND
THE NUMBER ONE SIGN YOU'VE JOINED A CHEAP HMO....
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1.
YOU ASK FOR VIAGRA, YOU GET A POPSICLE STICK
AND DUCT TAPE!!!!
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